just_a_waiter (just_a_waiter) wrote,


Hi, welcome! How many in your party?

There's going to be four of us, and can we get the corner booth?
*Starts walking with our waiting for my answer*

I grab the menus and silverware and walk down to the booth. I place and prep the table. The busboy arrives with chips and salsa and I ask: May I get yo-

I want waters for the whole table. Another chips and salsa and a margarita.

Our standard flavor is lime, we also have mango, peach, and strawberry.

Just get me a regular margarita with salt.

Thank you ma'am. I'll be right back.

I went to the computer to place in her order. Walked to the back to get just one water. I'll be straight up with you: If you're here on a Tuesday afternoon, 15 minutes before Taco Tuesday starts, and you expect complete and total attention?! You can fuck right off. I have other tables that will take care of me a lot better than you.

Rant over.

As I exit the kitchen, I look at the bar and see that my margarita is almost ready. I walk over to her table and put her water down and place a straw on the rim.

Where are the chips and salsa, and the other waters?

As soon as the rest of your party arrives, I'll bring them out.

No, I want them out now.

Ma'am, the ice will melt and the coaster will be soggy. The chips will get cold and the salsa stale.

Just do it.

I turned around and headed for the bar, checking my other three tables along the way. When I got to the bar I picked up the margarita, stabbed the ticket and turned around, to see that her party was at the door, waving at her.

I walked slow to give them time to sit, and I placed the margarita down.

Hi ladies, welcome! May I get you all started with a drink?

I'd like a coke please.

May I have tea?

Sweet or unsweet?

Sweet tea please.

I want a jack and coke.

Would you like some water also?

Yes please.

After I got their drink orders, I left, and the busboy came right away with another set of chips and salsa. I love it when a bitch doesn't get her way. The whole time I was engaged with her friends, she was grilling me hard core. Trying to stare me down to death... Give it up lady, that's the reason I didn't bring out waters like you wanted.

By this time, it was well into Taco hell. At around 5:45, maybe 6, and a few drinks, they decide to order.

None of the ladies that came in after the fact wanted anything. They were content with their drinks and the chips and salsa the busboy kept bringing out.

Hey! Hey you! Waiter! Waiter!!

As soon as I am finished with a table just down the row, I walk up.


I want a menu, I want to order something.

Sure thing.

I ask the hostes to hand me a menu and a desert menu.

With them in hand, I pull out my pad and hand her the menus as I arrive.

Is there something specific you had in mind? Maybe I can help you choose?

I'll let you know when I'm ready.

And with the wave of her hand, and the lowering of her gaze from me to the menu gave me a pretty strong hint that she was "done with me".

Ok guy.

Bouncing 8 tables at once, with them all having tacos and needing things fast, and this cunt is taking her sweet ass time every chance I'm at her booth...

She raises her hand at me from across the restaurant, and after I finish running food for a fellow co worker, I walk over.

After 20 minutes of looking at the menus she says, "I have a question".

Ok, what may I help you with?

I want these nachos, but I only want chicken, cheese, guacamole and sour cream.

Not even the grilled veggies? It won't have much body, it'll be more of an appetizer than a meal.

It's ok I'm not that hungry. We're inn a hurry, so if you could... And get me another margarita.

By this time, it's almost 7. If they really were in a hurry, they would have left around 6. What ever... The restaurant is in full gear. The cooks in the back are shouting to each other back and forth, coordinating grilling and prepping to get dishes out right. The mass quantity of tacos that comes out is unreal. The bar is also in high gear, we have $1 bud light and ultra drafts along with the tacos, and people order 3 or 4 per person at a time. Needless to say, it was going to be a while. Maybe even 15 mins before her food was ready.

I severely underestimated the speeds of both the kitchen and the bar. Her nachos came out first, exactly how she ordered them, but I was running drinks for another table when that happened, and she turned them away and sent them back. After I finished running drinks, I went back to the bar to find my margarita being made, so I went to the kitchen and asked what happened with the nachos.

I was told she wanted the grilled veggies, or else it wouldn't be "fajita nachos", when I specifically remember telling her that with out the veggies, the nachos won't have much body, and she insisted on not having them anyway. When I left the kitchen, I went to the bar, grabbed my margarita, and walked to her table.

Here you go ma'am, I was told what was wrong with the nachos, but I recall asking you if you were sure you didn't want them and you said no.

I did not, why would I order fajita nachos then?

You totally told him no babe.

Yeah, we heard you say no.

Shut up, I don't want the nachos. And this margarita is 7 minutes late, I won't pay for it either.

Ma'am, I understand you're frustrated, but I'm trying to resolve this. What may I do to appease the situation?

Bring us our checks. We're all on our own tabs. I'm only paying for one margarita, and that's it. Here's four dollars.

As she gathers her things, I look at her friends bewildered as to this situation. They seem as surprised as I am to what's happening, I just don't say anything and leave.

I check on my other tables before going to my manager and explaining the situation to him. He's a nice guy, very understanding. He and I split her tab after a 50% discount, and just leave it at that. Once she leaves and I have split the checks, I go back to the table, to find 3 of the 4 ladies still there.

Here you are ladies, I humbly apologize for any inconvenience I may have caused you. If there's anything I may do for you, please let me know.

Not for me, you did a really good job.

Pfft... You we're great!

Yeah, I don't know what got into her, you were awesome!

I get the feeling it was the booze talking, or them feeling bad for me because of her friend... But regardless, it was nice to hear that they at least appreciated me.

We're paying cash, put our tabs together.

After two more rounds of margaritas, they paid and left.

With their tip, I paid that cunts tab tenfold and then some.

Every other table that night was relatively smooth. With the occasional brat who orders chicken fingers and asks for ranch dressing...

All in all, it was a good night.

I had off today, and I've just been catching up on some sleep, I need it.

  • Post a new comment


    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic